I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
