she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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