The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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