theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
