I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize