He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize
