i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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