Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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