So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
