Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
My vagina is very pro this idea
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
