question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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