The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
