sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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