you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
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