A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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