I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
