how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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