Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
