But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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