those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
