FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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