i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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