Dual....:-)
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize