Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Randomize
