why didn't you poke me back
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
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