Your tits are I can't wait for
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
