I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I understand Curling. That high.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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