check it out our google latitudes are spooning
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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