I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
