You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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