we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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