I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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