i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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