I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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