look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
