he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Randomize
