I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
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