I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
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