If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
