we have officially lost it.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
