Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Randomize
