i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
