my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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