Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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