I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
