he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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