if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
This house was built for laser tag.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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