i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize
