He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
