k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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