and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
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