Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Randomize