My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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